诺贝尔文学经典:《宠儿》第1章Part 32

"Oh, yes. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Someday you be walking down the road and you hear something or seesomething going on. So clear. And you think it's you thinking it up. A thought picture. But no. It'swhen you bump into a rememory that belongs to somebody e I was before I came here, that place is real. It's never going away. Even if the whole farm— every tree and grass blade of it dies. The picture is still there and what's more, if you go there— you who never was there — if you go there and stand in the place where it was, it will happenagain; it will be there for you, waiting for you. So, Denver, you can't never go there. Never. Because even though it's all over — over and done with — it's going to always be there waiting foryou. That's how come I had to get all my children out. No matter what."Denver picked at her fingernails.
"If it's still there, waiting, that must mean that nothing ever dies."Sethe looked right in Denver's face. "Nothing ever does," she said.
"You never told me all what happened. Just that they whipped you and you run off, pregnant. Withme."
"Nothing to tell except schoolteacher. He was a little man. ys wore a collar, even in the fields. A schoolteacher, she said.
That made her feel good that her husband's sister's husband had book learning and was willing tocome farm Sweet Home after Mr.
Garner passed. The men could have done it, even with Paul F sold.
But it was like Halle said. She didn't want to be the only white person on the farm and a womantoo. So she was satisfied when the schoolteacher agreed to come. He brought two boys with him.
Sons or nephews. I don't know. They called him Onka and had pretty manners, all of em. Talkedsoft and spit in handkerchiefs. Gentle in a lot of ways. You know, the kind who know Jesus by Hisfirst name, but out of politeness never use it even to His face. A pretty good farmer, Halle said. Notstrong as Mr. Garner but smart enough. He liked the ink I made. It was her recipe, but he preferredhow I mixed it and it was important to him because at night he sat down to write in his book. Itwas a book about us but we didn't know that right away. We just thought it was his manner to askus questions. He commenced to carry round a notebook and write down what we said. I still thinkit was them questions that tore Sixo up. Tore him up for all time."She stopped.

“噢，是的。噢，是的是的是的。哪天你走在路上，你会听到、看到一些事情。清楚极了。让你觉得是你自己编出来的。一幅想象的画。可是不然。那是你撞进了别人的重现的记忆。我来这儿之前待过的地方，那个地点是真的。它永远不会消失。哪怕整个农庄———它的一草一木———都死光，那幅画依然存在；更要命的是，如果你去了那里———你从来没去过———如果你去了那里，站在它存在过的地方，它还会重来一遍；它会为你在那里出现，等着你。所以，丹芙，你永远不能去那儿。永远不能。因为虽然一切都过去了———过去了，结束了———它还将永远在那里等着你。那就是为什么我必须把我的孩子们全都弄出来。千方百计。”丹芙抠着指甲。
“要是它还在那儿等着，那就是说什么都不死。”塞丝直盯着丹芙的脸。“什么都不死。”她说。
“你从来没有原原本本给我讲过一遍。只讲过他们拿鞭子抽你，你就逃跑了，怀着身孕。怀着我。”
“除了‘学校老师’没什么好讲的。他是个小个子。很矮。总戴着硬领，在田里也不例外。是个学校老师，她说。
她丈夫的妹夫念过书，而且在加纳先生去世后愿意来经营‘甜蜜之家’，这让她感觉良好。
本来农庄里的男人们能管好它，尽管保罗·F被卖掉了。
但是正像黑尔说的，她不愿意做农庄上唯一的白人，又是个女人。所以‘学校老师’同意来的时候她很满意。他带了两个小子来。
不是儿子就是侄子。我不清楚。他们叫他叔叔。举止讲究，仨人都是。轻声说话，痰吐在手绢里。在好多方面都很绅士。你知道，是那种知道耶稣小名，可出于礼貌，就是当着他的面也绝不叫出来的人。一个挺不错的农庄主，黑尔说。没有加纳先生那么壮实，可是够聪明的。他喜欢我做的墨水。那是她的制法，但他更喜欢我搅拌的；这对他很重要，因为晚上他要坐下来写他的书。是本关于我们的书，可是我们当时并不知道。我们只想到，他问我们问题是出于习惯。他由带着笔记本到处走、记下我们说的话入手。我一直觉得是那些问题把西克索给毁了。永远地毁了。”她打住了。