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轻松幽默笑话

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笑话是一种增强快乐的文化,常常以篇幅短小,故事情节简单,文笔巧妙的形式出现,给人以出乎意料,并且取得笑意的艺术效果的文化。在忙碌的生活,我们也需要偶尔的放松一下自己。下面本站小编为大家带来轻松幽默笑话,希望大家喜欢!

轻松幽默笑话

 轻松幽默笑话:幸运的顾客

All the housewives who went to the new supermarket had one great ambition: to be the lucky customer who did not have to pay for her shopping. For this was what the notice just inside the entrance promised. It said: "remember, once a week,one of our customers gets free goods. This may be your lucky day!”

所有去新开张超市的主妇都有一个美好的愿望:成为一个购物不用交钱的幸运顾客。因为这是入口处的一则商店启事所承诺的。上面写着:“请记住,每周有一位顾客可以免费购物。今天也许就是您的幸运日!”

For several weeks Mrs. Edwards hoped, like many of her friends, to be the lucky customer. Unlike her friends, she never gave up hope. The cupboards in her kitchen were full of things, which she did not need. Her husband tried to advise her against buying things but failed. She dreamed of the day when the manager of the supermarket would approach her and say,"Madam, this is your lucky day. Everything in your basket is free.”

正像她的许多朋友一样,有好几个礼拜,爱德华太太都在盼望着自己会是那位幸运顾客。跟朋友不同的是,她从来不放弃这种期望。家里厨房的碗柜中都塞满了她并不需要的东西。她的丈夫劝她不要乱买东西,但是她不听。她梦想着有一天超市的经理走到她的面前对她说:“夫人,今天是您的幸运日,您篮子里的每样东西都是免费的。”

On Friday morning, after she had finished her shopping and taken it to her car, she found that she had forgotten to buy any tea. She dashed back to the supermarket, got the tea and went towards the cash desk. As she did so, she saw the manager of the supermarket approach her. "Madam,”he said, holding out his hand, "I want to congratulate you! You are our lucky customer and everything you have in your basket is free”

一个周五的早晨,她在采购完把东西放进车里后,发现自己忘记了买茶叶。她快步回到超市,取了茶叶后走向收银处。正在此时,他看到商店的经理朝她走来,“夫人,”说着他伸出手来,“我要恭喜您!您是我们的幸运顾客,您篮子里的所有东西都是免费的。”

 轻松幽默笑话:有时是我的

Hank lived in a small town, but then he got a job in a big city and moved there with his wife and his two children.

汉克住在一个小镇上,但他在大城市中找了一份工作,于是她与妻子和两个孩子搬到了城里。

On the first Saturday in their new home, Hank took his new red car out of garage and was washing it when a neighbor came by. When he saw Hank's new car, the neighbor stopped and looked at it for a minute. Then Hank turned and saw him.

在搬到新居的第一个周末,汉克把他红色的新车从车库里开出来冲洗,这时有位邻居路过。看到汉克的新车,这位邻居驻足仔细看了一会儿。汉克转身时看见了他。

The neighbor said, "That’s a nice car. Is it yours?”

邻居说:“真是辆漂亮的轿车。是你的?”

“Sometimes ,” Hank answered.

“有时候是的。”汉克回答道。

The neighbor was surprised. “Sometimes?" hesaid, "Whatdoyoumean?"

邻居感到很费解:“有时候是你的?这是什么意思?”

"Well ,”answered Hank slowly , "when there’s a patty in town, it belongs to my daughter, Jane. When there's a football game somewhere , it belongs to my son , Joe. When I've washed it,and it looks really nice and clean , it belongs to my wife. And when it needs gas, it’s mine.”

“是这样的,”汉克慢慢地说道:“当镇上有聚会的时候,它属于我女儿简;当哪个地方有足球赛的时候,它属于我的儿子乔;当车子洗好以后,看起来又漂亮又干净,这时候它属于我妻子;当车子需要加油的时候,它就是我的了。”

  轻松幽默笑话:健忘的丈夫

My husband’s uncle thought he had conquered the problem of trying to remember his wife a birthday and their anniversary. He opened an account with a florist, provides him with the relevant dates and gave instructions to send flowers along with an appropriate note signed, “your loving husband.”

我丈夫的叔叔想他已解决了试图记住妻子的生日及他们结婚纪念日的难题。他在一家花店开了个户头,告诉店主相关的日期,并指示他送花时附上写有“爱你的丈夫”的纸片。

His wife was thrilled by this new display of attention and all went well until one day, many bouquets later, when he came home, kissed his wife and said offhanded1y, "nice flowers honey. Where'd you get them?"

他妻子对这种关怀的新表现感到十分欣喜。他的这一办法颇为有效,在送了许多束鲜花之后,有一天。他回到家,吻了吻妻子,然后漫不经心地问道:“好漂亮的鲜花,亲爱的。你从哪里’弄来的?”