这些恋情建议真的很糟糕
1. LIVING TOGETHER IS A GREAT WAY TO TEST THE WATERS FOR THE FUTURE
1. 同居是测试未来合不合的好方法The problem with this advice is that very few couples have a seamless move-in experience, which means it's easy to assume that a few hiccups along the way mean your relationship is doomed. "Healthy, happy couples don't start out compatible," explains Patty Newbold, a marriage educator. "They build their relationship skills dealing with the small differences so that they're ready for the big ones that come along later. Create a lifestyle and a home you're both compatible with, and do it together, so you're ready for whatever illnesses, losses, disabilities, career changes, lapses in character, and childrearing challenges might come up later."
这个建议存在的问题是，只有少数情侣有无缝同居的经历，这就意味着假如你们的恋情出现阻碍，你们会很容易觉得这段恋情注定失败。"健康、快乐的情侣一开始的时候也会有矛盾，"婚姻教育家帕蒂·纽博德解释道。"他们会通过一些小事积累恋爱技巧，以后遇到大问题的时候就能从容应对。创造一种你们都觉得不错的生活方式和家庭，共同努力，这样你就会做好准备，应对未来可能出现的任何疾病、损失、残疾、职业变化、性格缺失和抚养孩子的挑战。"
2. PLAY HARD TO GET
2. 欲擒故纵
"The vast majority of the time playing hard to get guarantees that both of you are going to end up alone," says James Anderson, dating expert at Beyond Ages. "The dating world is competitive and few people have the time to constantly pursue someone who is not demonstrating any interest. Stop playing these silly games and show a little interest back. You will be giving yourself many more opportunities with people you otherwise might have missed out on."
"对于大多数玩欲擒故纵这一招的人来说，最后的结果是：俩人都独自一身，"Beyond Ages的约会专家詹姆斯·安德森说道。"约会的世界竞争力强，只有少数人有时间不断追求对其没有兴趣的人。不要再玩这些愚蠢的游戏了，也对他/她表现出兴趣吧。这样你就会给那些你可能错过的人更多的机会。"3. FORGIVE AND forget
3. 既往不咎"Forgiveness is absolutely crucial to having a healthy relationship, but forgetting is not necessary," says Monte Drenner, a licensed mental health counselor in Orlando, FL. "'Forgive and let go' is better advice."
"原谅对于建立健康的恋情关系至关重要，但却没有必要忘记，"弗罗里达州奥兰多的持证心理健康顾问Monte Drenner说道。"'原谅且不追究'是更好的建议。"4. AGE IS JUST A NUMBER
4. 年龄只是数字There are certainly relationships with age gaps that work out beautifully, but experts say couples closer in age tend to be happier. "Age matters less as you get older-that's true. But dating someone close to your age has huge benefits," says Anna Wood, dating and lifestyle expert. "You'll have the same cultural references, interests, and grow into new life stages at the same time."
当然，有些恋人虽然相差好几岁但却能相处和睦，但专家表示：年龄相近的情侣往往更幸福。"随着年龄的增长，年龄变得不那么重要--这是事实。但与年龄相近的人约会却能带来巨大好处，"约会和生活方式专家安娜·伍德说道。"你们将拥有相同的文化、兴趣，并同时成长进入生活中的新阶段。"5. IF YOU FALL OUT OF love, YOU SHOULD GET DIVORCED
5. 如果你们俩不爱了，那就应该离婚"This is one of the worst things I hear from people over and over again," says Irina Baechle, a relationship therapist and coach. "The truth is, falling in love is merely a nature trick pulling humans into marriage to reproduce."
"这是我从别人口中反复听到的最糟糕的建议，"恋情治疗师和教练Irina Baechle说道。"事实上，坠入爱河只不过是把人类带入婚姻进行繁殖的大自然的把戏。"
