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搞笑的短篇英语笑话大全

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笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。与此同时,笑话也是人们反对极权和专制制度的有力武器。本站小编整理了搞笑的短篇英语笑话,欢迎阅读!

搞笑的短篇英语笑话大全
  搞笑的短篇英语笑话:Home Medical Remedy

A man walks into his doctor's office and puts a note on the table for the doctor to read. It said, "I can't talk! Help me!"

The doctor nodded sagely, and instructed the man to put his thumb on the table. The man thinks to himself that his thumb has nothing to do with his inability to talk, but he does as the doctor ordered.

The doctor quickly picked up a big book and whacks the man's thumb with it as hard as he could.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" the man yelled.

"Good, good," the doctor said. "Come back tomorrow and we'll work on the 'B'."

  搞笑的短篇英语笑话:Take Thee To A Nunnery

Sitting behind some nuns (whose habits partially blocked their view) at a hockey game, three men decided to badger the nuns in an effort to get them to move.

In a very loud voice, the first guy said, "I think I'm going to move to Utah, there are only 100 nuns living there."

The second guy spoke up and said, "I want to go to Montana , there are only 50 nuns living there."

The third guy said, "I want to go to Idaho , there are only 25 nuns living there."

One of the nuns turned around, looked at the men, and in a very sweet, calm voice said, "Why don't you go to hell? There aren't any nuns there!"

  搞笑的短篇英语笑话:Like father like son 有其父必有其子

Once a boy's grandfather beat his grandson for playing with fire in the courtyard.

The boy's father saw this and he got worried about his son. So he took astick and began beating himself. The grandfather was surprised and asked:

"Why are you beating yourself?"

"You are beating my son and I'm beating your son." The boy's father answered.

一个小孩因为玩火被爷爷打了一顿。

孩子的父亲看到后很心疼自己的儿子。因此,他拿起一根棍子开始打自己。孩子的爷爷见到后很不理解,便问道:

“你为什么打你自己呢?”

孩子的父亲说:“因为你打了我儿子,所以我也要打你儿子。”

  搞笑的短篇英语笑话:Absent-minded Mark Twain 心不在焉的马克·吐温

The famous American writer Mark Twain was well-known for his absent-mindedness.

One day, when he was riding in a train, the conductor asked him for his ticket。

Mark Twain looked for the ticket in all his pockets, but he didn't find it. At last, the conductor knew the writer, so he said: "It doesn't matter. Show me your ticket on your way back. And if you don't find it, there is no trouble."

"Oh, but I must find the dammed thing, otherwise how will I know where I am going?"

美国著名作家马克吐温以心不在焉著称于世。

一天,他乘火车去旅行,列车员找他查票。

马克·吐温翻遍了所有衣服的口袋,也没有找到车票。正好列车员认识这位作家,便说:“真的没什么大不了的。回来时你把车票给我看看好了。万一找不到,也没有多大关系。”

“哦,我必须找到这该死的东西,不然我怎么知道自己要上哪儿去呢?”


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