《美食祈祷和恋爱》Chapter 14 (26):意大利语学习班开课大纲

First, though, I must get settled into School. My classes begin today at the Leonardo da Vinci Academy of Language Studies, where I will be studying Italian five days a week, four hours a day. I'm so excited about school. I'm such a shameless student. I laid my clothes out last night, just like I did before my first day of first grade, with my patent leather shoes and my new lunch box. I hope the teacher will like me.

不过，首先，我得料理学校的事。我在达•芬奇语言学院（Leonardo da Vinci Academy of Language Studies）的意大利语课今天开课，每星期五天、每天四个小时。上学很让我兴奋。我是个毫不怕羞的学生。昨晚我把我的衣服摆出来，就像我在小学一年级开学前一天，摆好我的漆皮皮鞋和新便当盒一般。希望老师会喜欢我。

We all have to take a test on the first day at Leonardo da Vinci, in order to be placed in the proper level of Italian class for our abilities. When I hear this, I immediately start hoping I don't place into a Level One class, because that would be humiliating, given that I already took a whole entire semester of Italian at my Night School for Divorced Ladies in New York, and that I spent the summer memorizing flash cards, and that I've already been in Rome a week, and have been practicing the language in person, even conversing with old grandmothers about divorce. The thing is, I don't even know how many levels this school has, but as soon as I heard the word level, I decided that I must test into Level Two—at least.

在达芬•奇的第一天，我们每个人都必须进行测验，以按照能力分派到适当的意大利语班别。我一听，立即开始期望自己不要被分配到初级班，因为这是很不光彩的事，毕竟我已在纽约的“离婚女子夜校”上了一整个学期的意大利语课，背了一整个夏天的生字卡，而且在罗马已待了一个礼拜，已实地练习语言，甚至和老祖母聊过了离婚。事实上，我根本不晓得这学校分多少级别，但我一听见“分级”，便立即决定至少得考进二级班才行。

So it's hammering down rain today, and I show up to school early (like I always have—geek!) and I take the test. It's such a hard test! I can't get through even a tenth of it! I know so much Italian, I know dozens of words in Italian, but they don't ask me anything that I know. Then there's an oral exam, which is even worse. There's this skinny Italian teacher interviewing me and speaking way too fast, in my opinion, and I should be doing so much better than this but I'm nervous and making mistakes with stuff I already know (like, why did I say Vado a scuola instead of Sono andata a scuola? I know that!).

那天倾盆大雨，而我早早就到了学校（我向来如此——怪胎！），做了测验。真困难的测验！我甚至没办法完成十分之一！我知道很多意大利文，我认识成打的意大利单字，但我懂得的，他们都没考。接着是口试，情况更惨。给我面试的是个削瘦的意大利老师，依我看来，话说得太快，而我本该表现得更好，却因为紧张，明明早已知道的东西也出了错（比方说，我干嘛不说“我要去上学Sono andata，却说“我上学”Vado a scuola？我明明知道的呀！）。

In the end, it's OK, though. The skinny Italian teacher looks over my exam and selects my class level: Level TWO!

结果却是还好。意大利瘦老师检查了我的试卷，给了我的级别——二级班！

Classes begin in the afternoon. So I go eat lunch (roasted endive) then saunter back to the school and smugly walk past all those Level One students (who must be molto stupido, really) and enter my first class. With my peers. Except that it becomes swiftly evident that these are not my peers and that I have no business being here because Level Two is really impossibly hard. I feel like I’m swimming, but barely. Like I'm taking in water with every breath. The teacher, a skinny guy (why are the teachers so skinny here? I don't trust skinny Italians), is going way too fast, skipping over whole chapters of the textbook, saying, "You already know this, you already know that . . ." and keeping up a rapid-fire conversation with my apparently fluent classmates. My stomach is gripped in horror and I'm gasping for air and praying he won’t call on me. Just as soon as the break comes, I run out of that classroom on wobbling legs and I scurry all the way over to the administrative office almost in tears, where I beg in very clear English if they could please move me down to a Level One class. And so they do. And now I am here.

课程在下午开始。于是我去吃午饭（烤莴苣），而后漫步回校，得意洋洋地从初级班学生面前走过（他们肯定“molto stupido”很笨），我和程度与我相当的同学们一起走进第一堂课的教室。只不过，很快我就发现，他们不是和我程度相当的同学，我无权待在这个班，因为二级班的课程困难得令人难以置信。我觉得像在游泳，却游得很勉强，就像每换一口气就吃到水。瘦个子男老师（这儿的老师怎么都这么瘦？我不信任削瘦的意大利人）讲话太快，跳过整章整章课文，说：“这个你们都会了，那个你们都会了。”……不断跟我那些对答如流的同学们连珠炮似的对谈。恐惧紧抓着我的胃，我喘着气，祈祷他不会叫到我。下课时间一到，我就脚步踉跄地跑出教室，几乎泪眼汪汪地一路跑去行政办公室，用非常清晰的英语乞求能否让我换到初级班。他们这么做了。于是现在我就在初级班。

This teacher is plump and speaks slowly. This is much better.

Eat, Pray, Love

老师是个胖子，讲话速度慢。这好多了。