搞笑简短的英语幽默故事

英语幽默故事简短，内容诙谐幽默，情节生动有趣。今天小编整理了一些英语小故事，希望对大家喜欢。

英语幽默故事：同辈的压力

My teen-age son，Chad，and nine of his friends came home one night with newly Pierced ears. When his grandmother heard about it，she asked him why he did it.”Peer pressure," Chad told her.

一天晚上，我十几岁的儿子查理，带着九个朋友回到家，他们都扎了耳朵眼儿。当儿子的奶奶听说了这件事时，她问我儿子为什么要这样做，查理告诉她:“是同辈的压力。”

"You should be a leader instead of a follower，”Grandma said.

奶奶说：“你应该做个领头的，”

"I was,"he replied. "It was my idea.”

“我是个领头的。”他回答说：“这是我的主意。”

英语幽默故事：聪明的鸟

When the burglar broke into a seemingly empty room one night, a voice suddenly shattered the silence ;"I see you,and the saint sees you. "

一位窃贼一天夜里闯进一个好像没有人的空房子。突然寂静中传来一声:“我看见你了，圣人也看见你了。”

The shaken thief took another tentative step.“I see you，”the voice said again:“and the saint sees you.“With that，the burglar shined his flashlight in the direction that the voice was coming from. There，in the circle of light，sat a parrot.

这位惊恐不安的贼又试图再走一步，那个声音又说:“我看见你了，圣人也看见你了。”听到声音，窃绒用手电照着声音所传来的方向。在那边儿，一束灯光下坐着一只鹦鹉。

"Dumb bird,!'the burglar uttered in relief.

“该死的鸟，”窃贼像松了口气似地骂着。

"I see you，”the parrot repeated,”and the saint sees you. "

“我看见你了。”鹦鹉重复地叨唠着:“圣人也看见你了。”

"Shut up，“the man snarled as he turned on a lamp， that's when he saw the menacing Doberman Pinscher sitting beside the parrot's perch，staring at him with glittering eyes.

“闭嘴，”窃贼边开灯，边喊叫着。这时他发现一条眼光咄咄逼人的构坐在鹦鹉旁。

" Sic' em，Saint,"squawked the parrot.

鹦鹉尖叫着:“圣人，扑呀!扑呀!”

英语幽默故事：妻子的欲望

A woman and her husband were out shopping when she realized that she needed to purchase some hair color for her graying hair

一位女士在与他的丈夫购物时，她意识到她该为她的灰白头发买些染发水了。

"When are you going to stop buying that expensive stuff ,"complained the husband."and let your hair go gray like Barbara Bush?"

她丈夫抱怨说:“你什么时候才能停止买那些昂贵的东西，而让你的头发长成像芭芭拉.布什(总统夫人)的头发那样灰白呢?”

"The day that you're inaugurated,"the wife replied.“

那就要等到你就职的那天了。”妻子说。