不该问男朋友的8个问题
1. "Should I get my hair cut?" Yes? No? We like ... your hair? If you're just taking half an inch off or something, we're not even going to notice (unless you already have your hair short ... like half an inch short). This is just putting us in a situation where three things could happen: We say "yes," and you get offended because we don't like your hair as is. We say "no," and you cut it anyway. Or we both happen to agree. None of those situations are constructive and at least one ends in you getting mad at us.
2. "Which dress looks best?" Our answer is always going to be the one that shows off your cleavage the most and then you're going to get mad we chose that one.
2. “哪条裙子更好看呢？”我们总是挑那条露出事业线的裙子，然后你就会发飙。3. "Do you want to come to my mom's birthday party?" No. We're going to go because we're obligated, but we'd rather stay home and screw around. Please don't tease us with the illusion of choice. Just tell us what day it is.
3. “你要不要参加我母亲的生日聚会？”不。但我们还是会去的，因为我们有这个义务啊，但我们更想待在家里四处乱走。不要嘲笑我们的选择幻想，只要告诉我们日期就行了。
4. Literally anything about your weight. Anything. You're good. You look good. And if you're asking, you're not going to believe us anyway. Just don't sweat it.
4. 任何有关你体重的事情都不要问！不管是什么，在我眼里你都很好看，很健康。如果你问的话，你也不会相信我们。只要别逼问我们就行了。5. "Did your ex do this better?" As far as we're concerned, our ex is dead to us so it doesn't matter.
5. “你的前任是不是做的更好啊？”就男生而言，我们认为前任已经不存在了，一点都不重要。6. "Do find Jennifer Lawrence attractive?" Please don't ask this, because the answer is "yes" and you don't want to hear us say "yes" and we're also bad liars. Plus, it doesn't mean we don't like you. It just means we have eyes.
6. “你觉得大表姐（詹妮弗•劳伦斯）吸引人吗？”请千万别问这个，因为答案肯定是“当然”，但你又不想听到这个答案，而且我们撒谎技术又不行。另外，这并不表示我们不喜欢你。这只是意味着我们的眼睛不会骗人。7. "Notice anything different?" The only time you should ask this question is if you literally want your boyfriend to shit his pants for some reason. We probably don't know, unless it's something incredibly obvious like you dyed your hair a (drastically) different color or surgically grafted your iPhone to your face. Please don't make us guess.
7. “有没有注意到我有什么变化？”你问这个问题的唯一时机就是你真的想吓坏你的男票。我们可能不会注意到，除非你真的做了一些什么明显的事情，比如很夸张的染了头发或是动了手术将苹果手机嫁接到了你的脸上。可别让我们猜了。8. "What are you thinking about?" Something stupid. It's always something stupid and the reason we don't want to tell you is that it would take way too long to explain. It's not because we were thinking of breaking up with you or even about you at all. We were honestly daydreaming about the dumbest thing ever and it isn't worth explaining.
8. “你在想什么？”想一些很蠢的事情。我们想的总是无关紧要的事情，我们不想告诉你是因为要花很长的时间来解释。我们并不是在想与你分手，甚至所想的事情完全与你无关。我们只是在做白日梦，想一些很蠢的事情，根本就不值得解释。
