你可以做这件事捍卫你们的婚姻

Everyone is susceptible to an affair and it can happen to any one of us if we're not paying attention. But, you (not your partner) can safeguard your relationship from a tryst, entanglement, emotional, or physical affair.

稍不留神，你可能就出轨了，每个人都有这种可能。但是，你（不是你的另一半）可以捍卫你的恋情，防止幽会、纠结、精神出轨或肉体出轨。

You can learn how to save a marriage from a potential infidelity. Few affairs are intentional and, in fact, most take someone completely by surprise. So you're married or in a committed relationship. Things are 'okay' or maybe 'not so great'. It's not so bad that you feel the need to do something about it, like work with a couple therapist. Maybe you think you're fine, you're tough, and you can handle it.

你可以学着拯救潜在出轨的婚姻。只有少部分的外遇是人们故意为之，事实上，大多数的出轨情况都是令人意想不到的。所以，你现在是已婚状态，或是有了另一半。你们之间相处的'还行'，或许'没那么好'。你觉得需要做些什么来保持恋情的新鲜，比如去看夫妻治疗师，这种感觉真是糟透了。也许你觉得没问题，你很坚强，你相信自己能够度过感情危机。

If this sounds familiar, pay attention because an affair can happen to you. It happened just like that to me. I was the person who stepped out in my first marriage and I see it again and again and again. When we shut ourselves down, detach and fail to honor what our hearts and minds are telling us, we are disconnecting. Instead of looking under the hood, we keep driving, not taking it for maintenance.

这听起来非常耳熟，但是请注意，因为你也可能出轨。我就是这样的一个例子。我走出了我的第一段婚姻，但我总是不断回忆。当我们封闭自己、不愿听从内心的感受时，我们就貌合神离了。就好像我们一直在开车却忘了查看引擎盖、忘了保养。

What started as needing a 'little oil' now needs a full-blown engine overhaul. And while all that was happening, someone else appeared to have the right parts for what was broken. When we ignore that something is going wrong, it paves the way for someone to enter into our lives to show us just exactly how wrong it is and "turn on" what we're missing. When the switch is flipped, it takes nearly superhuman strength to turn away.

本来只是需要上点油的事情却演变成全面检修发动机。发生这些情况的时候，正好有个人有合适的零件，可以修复破坏的部分。当我们忽视感情出现问题的时候，这就为别人闯入我们的生活铺垫了道路，他/她会让我们知道这段感情是个错误，会激发我们所逝去的激情。这种情况一旦开始，就很难抽身了。

Let's face it, it's the perfect storm and we didn't even know it was brewing. The current Generation X or Millennials may disagree with me, but hear me out. Opposite-sex friendships and work relationships can be the wellspring for affairs.

让我们面对现实吧，这就是场完美风暴，而我们甚至都不知道它正在酝酿之中。当前的X一代（Generation X）或千禧一代可能并不同意我的观点，但请听我说。异性朋友和同事可能就是你出轨的对象。

It's innocent to start with and may remain that way for some time. Casual conversation about politics, the weather, or maybe it's after hours projects followed by drinks. As friendships develop a deeper emotional connection, it's normal to share more intimate details about our lives.

刚开始的时候，你们之间很纯洁，这段纯洁的关系可能会持续一段时间。偶尔会聊聊政治、天气，或者几个小时聊完项目之后又喝了几杯。因为朋友可能演变成更深层次的精神交流，所以和他们分享生活中一些更为私人的细节也是很正常的。